My Most Precious Possessions

As a starting point in this project I was asked to bring 10 things (could be anything) that were precious to me. I was then asked analyze why these things were special to me an what the revealed about my identity and self. I actually discovered a lot about myself this process and discovered interesting connections and reoccurring themes within a collection of objects ans things which I though were very random.

I went through a rebellious 'goth' phase in my early teens, which I now cringe about and quite a few of these objects were fragments from this period of my life ('Bleeding Edge' Gothic Doll, Emily the Strange Book of Strange, Evanescence CD), and most of the remaining objects had a slightly 'dark' feel about them. This proved to me that although I cringe about this phase of my life now, it has made me who I am today and has helped me to develop my personal style.


(Please excuse the tacky MySpace style gif! I could't resist! I also love the nostalgic feel that it brings, so this kind of stuff may have to become a regular feature on my blog!)

One of my tutors looked at my objects and her first comment was: "You were born in the wrong time! You should've been 18 in the early 90's!"and I must say she read me perfectly just from looking at these objects. My outlook on life often reflects that of a 90's teenager in the midst of grunge culture: miserable, pessimistic and hating everything, wanting to destroy and rebel, feeling angry and lost.
Seeing the world through a grey lens.

These are some isolated photos of my objects and why they are so special to me in chronological order, like a retrospective of my life:

I got this Gothic doll from Camden Market when I was 12. It was £25, which was a lot of money for me in those days and had been wanting to buy it for ages so spent months saving up my pocket money. I was so happy when I finally bought it, I felt like it had a completed me. It was also one of the first things I bought when I entered my 'gothic' phase so marks a big turning point in my life of growing up and discovering how to express my individual style.

This book is entitled 'Emily the Strange book of Strange' which was bought for me by my aunt for my 13th Birthday when she realised I was becoming a bit of rebellious, early teen wannabe goth. Aesthetically, the book has a lot in common with the doll- the minimal black, white and red colour scheme, the girl in the book Emily, has the same pale white face and jet black, and both have a very miserable and sinister feel. Apart from the style, another reason as to why this book is such a strong part of my identity is that the text is all about being a bit different from everyone else, learning to enjoy your own company in times of loneliness and seeing the world in unusual ways.

This is my first ever mobile phone. It cost £20 and was given me by my parents when I was 9 and started taking the School bus on my own. It is important to me as it is a symbol of me growing up and gaining independence. It was 2003 when this phone was brand new and now it looks like an absolute piece of junk and doesn't even have a camera, but for me it provokes feelings of nostalgia ans shows the almost absurd amount of which technology has advanced in the past 10 years. As it no longer works, I decoded to turn it in to an ornament as a memory of my childhood by covering it in stickers and glitter glue which represents my love of creativity from a young age. I also spontaneously deiced to write 'Fuck' on it with  a Sharpie pen which I think creates an interesting contrast to the innocence of the stickers and could also represent how at this time in my life (the age of 9) I was quickly growing up and being exposed to the teenage world (there were a group of filthy mouthed teenage boys who also went on the same school bus, one day I came home and asked my mum what a 'wanker' and a 'condom' was).

These are some of my favourite albums. The Evanescence album was the first album I ever bought (aged 11) and I still listen to it to this day. It was recommend to me by a 15 year old girl in school who I really admired at the time for her individual style (she was known by many as 'the sock girl' for her extensive collection of colourful knee high socks, which often matched her equally brightly coloured hair). The sad, beautiful, haunting, yet aggressive sound reflects how I felt during my early teen years and also translated visually into my creative style and way of dressing. The other two albums 'Nevermind' by Nirvana and 'Ok Computer' by Radiohead, both of which I stole from my dad. Listening to these albums from an early age helped to shape my current obsession with the 90's and the 'grunge' movement', which is a big influence in my personal and creative style. I also noticed that the album artwork of these albums are all based around a similar shade of beautifully calming and cold blue which I would like to use in future designs.

I wish I had been a teen in the 90's and am obessed with the sound, aesthetic and mood of the grunge movement and how it relates to teenage angst and rebellion. Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love are, in my eyes, the King and Queen of the grunge movement, the embodiement and voice of that generation. I am also fascinated with the tragedy of Kurt Cobain's suicide and have read many biographies on his short but increadible life. I found these heat shaped frames lying around and decided to fill them with pictures of Cobain and Love as a reference to one of Nirvana's most famous songs from their final album 'In Utero
(1993)'.

 Dazed and Confused is one of my favourite magazines as I think it is so innovative, inspiring and interesting with such varied content. These particular copies are from 2004-5 and where bought for a pound each from Oxfam on Marlebone High Street. They are very special to me as they are like my own personal copies, as as currently, very few other people would be in possession of these copies as the are 'old' but not old enough to be 'vintage'. I really like how the fact that they are outdated by almost a decade as they are like pieces of history from the not so distant past. I actually find them far more interesting than current copies of the magazine as they are from different time which ironically makes them fresher than contemporary copies as the photoshoots in these magazines don't fit into the boxes of current trends, in fact the fashion shoots in these magazines seem to defy trends and are based on pure creativity making them almost timeless and more artistic. The adverts in these magazines, particularly for technology show how much the world has advanced in such a short space of time.

This Skins series 1&2 box-set was given to me for my 15th birthday. Skins is, in my opinion, the best teen drama ever broadcast. It truly sums up my generation and has very diverse and colourful characters which real teenagers can relate to. The character which I relate to most is Cassie as she is quirky, lives in a bit of dream world, sees things differently to most people but struggles emotionally. I think that series 1&2 which contain the original cast are by the best, I have watched the whole series countless times and never get bored of it. Skins is more than just a TV series, it is a work of art.

This book is my final piece for my GCSE Photography project. When I was doing my photography GCSE, I had the most amazing, inspiring teacher, who from the first lesson completely changed how I saw the world through my own eyes. He taught me to read the world around me through visual language and aesthetics, which completely shaped my creative outlook and helped me find my creative voice. he also taught me that beauty can be found in objects that are often classed as ugly like piles of rubbish on the street or abandoned buildings, if you focus on the shapes colours, tones and textures rather than the context or subject matter.

This card with a heart shaped charm was a gift from a  lovely woman called Ellen who I met in New York. She was the owner of a tiny vintage shop which was full of unique and beautiful pieces. When I was there I tried on a 1940's slip dress which she said looked beautiful on me. I was wearing baggy dungarees when I walked in so I think she was surprised at the transformation! I loved it so much I ended up buying it even though it was $140 and wore it my end of year ball. Afterwards she spent a long time chatting to me and my dad about life in NYC and when we left she hugged us warmly goodbye and gave this handwritten card with a heart charm to remember her by. My first ever trip to NYC was the most amazing experience of my life and inspired me to move there in the future, and this object is my favourite reminder of the trip.

This baby pink NY logo beanie is my favourite beanie in a collection of many (beanies are a bit of a trademark of my style). It is worth so much to me even though it was on sale for £3 in Camden market and I stole it anyway! I love the juxtaposition between the extremely soft, feminine, innocent childish colour and the aggressive, masculine connotations of the beanie and the NY Yankees logo. I also wore it constantly during my trip to NYC to keep warm in the blistering February cold, therefore this hat also brings back so many memories of this trip.

This is the entry wristband from the Secret Garden Party, which was the first festival I ever went to therefore this band will always mark a turning point in my life of independence. SGP was also one of the most amazing experiences of my life. It was an utterly surreal, freeing, life changing experience and I met so many amazing people there. I never though that life could be so beautiful before this festival.

This studded bumbag which I customised myself is another reminder of The Secret Garden Party, it was so useful for safely carrying my essentials like my phone, money and fags and I didn't take it off the whole time! I even slept with it on! The black leather and studs also reflection how there is still a strong Gothic element to my personal and creative style.